Tag Archives: S.O. He Says

1 Month of #DADDYDOM … A Few Things I’ve Learned and Observed

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IMG_8378by Weusi

In the past 30 days, what was formerly known as fatherhood and shall be called DADDYDOM henceforth, I have learned and been reminded about a few things … in no particular order … well except for the first being … God is GREAT and because of this, I am very blessed! And now … the rest of the list …

Little girls can direct their stream of pee.

People stay fakin’ the funk … talking about babies look so cute … WHATEVER! You know and I know that a lot of babies kinda look the same the first few weeks! It isn’t that they are cute … it’s that damn near all of ’em kinda look the same and no one wants to call them anything other than cute. We could call them chubby, low-functioning, little pie-faced blobs of new human-ness. Don’t get me wrong … they are cute, but that’s really because we’ve been conditioned to see them that way. But honestly, it’s not a special look.

I don’t see my daughter as a cute little baby to play with and spoil. I see her as the child for whom I am responsible. I have to help mold and prepare her for the world.

Wyntr Abrihet may never know her name because, in addition to being summoned by Wyntr, Wyntr Abrihet or Abrihet, she has a plethora of nicknames! Shelli calls her … Pumpkin, Boobie, booga, booga-booga, Sweet Potato, Chunka Munka, boo-key and other things. I call her: Lil’ Sunshine, Sunshine (But not like the character Sunshine in Boomerang), Chicken Wing (she does this thing with her arms … kinda like that dance Kendrick Lamar does in the video for “i”), Lil’ Mama, Wyn Boogie, Hiccup (she has had them since before she got here), and Stinky Booty. She might be a little confused. I can’t wait until her personality kicks in and she earns a real nickname. Wyntr is one of the FRESHEST names ever! No vowels. Y is only a part-time vowel. It doesn’t count! Who remembers this?!

Freeez – I.O.U.

Sometimes you just have let a baby cry. Don’t let the babies cry … figure out why they are crying. Sleep is a PRICELESS commodity. Women are super humans … if you don’t know why, then you may have subhuman intelligence. Babies are milk-a-holics. Music makes the world go around. It can have a great influence on an individual. When combined with a plethora of other factors, it has the ability to influence various aspects of one’s life. In my case, as someone who DJ’d on college radio and in lounges, it not only shaped who I have become, it also helped me to inspire others. I love that, in addition to listening to A Love Supreme by John Coltrane, Wyntr has jewels like these to chill her when she starts to get a little moody when being changed. image

Having a measure of time to mark events and to try to schedule things is good … and needed … BUT … with babies, there are many moments that just happen without regard to time.

New fathers … you may never be the same after that first diaper of that merconium tar stuff! I still can’t comprehend how all that fit inside her. It must expand when it hits the air!

A baby’s immune system can easily be compromised, so you can’t really take them on road trips to DC and NC right away!

If you have a baby and you have a partner, wife, husband, special friend, significant other, etc. … communicate with them! And do it in a manner where you just assume that both parties are sleep deprived, hungry, and borderline insane. Meaning, be conscious about the pace, tone, wording, and non-verbal presentation of information.

Did I already say something about sleep having incredible value in a parent’s life?

goodnight …

SHiNE

Some of Weusi’s 2014 Highlights … and a Happy New Year!

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then comes
by Weusi

I know that neither of us have been writing much. And I know that many of you will be disappointed that there are no hair tips in this post. But, as many of you may know, we are a little distracted. We have a baby on the way! But as we sit here … Shelli, asleep on her side, with a pillow tucked under her pretty little tummy, I have a computer on my lap and a mind full of words. So … what do I do? I decide to write! The past year has been full of ups and downs. I just want to share a few of my favorite moments …

release the beast on the soccer field

My big lil’ cuz, Ebony E-Boogie Thomas (she’s younger than me but is like 5′ 9″), shared this great pic with me early in 2014 and it’s my favorite #TBT pic … oh, yeah … that’s my pops looking like a light skinned Shaft unleashing a young Weusi on the football/soccer field.

giant stadium super bowl

I worked on the Super Bowl Halftime Show, which was an amazing experience. And I can’t front … Bruno Mars did his thing!

send me a text

Then this happened!

shelli 10 weeks to 24 weeks preggo

THERE IS A PERSON IN THERE …

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And science says she kinda looks like this. We’ll see in a week!

weusi hands up hood up

I know that this isn’t a positive thing in the eyes of many, but it should/could be an empowering and motivational thing for many. The hands up and hood up poses are undoubtedly a piece of history. We’ll see if the USA owns up it is as their history!?!

This also led to one of my favorite musical moments of the year … BE FREE by J. Cole. I love the emotional content he’s able to convey. “All we wanna do it take the chains off. All we wanna do is be free …”

granny neecy weusi f brown

My grandmother turned 100! Here she is with my Aunt Neecy, myself, and her 95 year young brother F. Brown (RIP).

anthony avery weusi and the pumpkin

I won another pumpkin at the pumpkin toss thingy! Thanks for inviting me out to Anthony, Avery and Jaclyn (not pictured)!

jayz and beyonce as frida and basquiat

I can’t front. This is one of the freshest halloween costumes ever! Frida & Basquiat! (i don’t know who Blue is)

My FAVORITE commercial of the year … I’m getting some cold cuts. I laugh out loud EVERY time i see it … and I don’t even eat cold cuts!I think I really enjoy the fact that someone is out there celebrating something that most people see as a mundane, day-to-day occurrence with such exuberance!

weusi overwhelmed at the baby shower

The baby shower. I was kind of overwhelmed at the expressions of love that this baby is coming into. I find myself thankful and humbled almost daily by the well wishes and love from close friends and acquaintances.

And then there is the end of the Colbert Report. That didn’t mean much to me, but the excitement of a powerful performance of a POWERFUL song and the anticipation of new music from Kendrick Lamar has me really looking forward to 2015.

weusi and shelli ugly sweaters

I also wanted to say that I REALLY thank you all for being so supportive of Shelli this past year. We really appreciate your prayers and well wishes. This has been an INCREDIBLE year. God is good! I wish you all the best in 2015!

#SHiNE

Perks

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by Weusi

Sometimes at the end of a gig, I walk away with a perk or two. Often, I take home some snacks, a few beverages, a candle from Pier 1, or some gadget from Bed, Bath and Beyond that I end up giving to someone before I even make it home. Then something special happened.

It was the end of a long day. I wanted to get home to Shelli. Then I saw him/it. And right there … behind the batman statue … was Ricky’s NYC (if you don’t know about it click the link!).

Initially, all I thought about was taking the picture of Batman. So, what you don’t see is the young lady handing out promo stuff.

I told her my wife had a blog and asked if she had any products for a curly girl. And then boom … I walk away with a bag of goodies! Some Miss Jessie’s, some Keratin stuff, some Mixed Chicks stuff, and a bunch of stuff I had no idea what it was … Win!

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On the way home, I realized Shelli doesn’t need any of this! I would just be enabling the product junkie in her. So, last weekend, I gave the bag to  Corey, one of my homies from FC Harlem. Why am I giving her products to someone else? They doen’t even know each other?

Well, actually … Corey has heard me talk about Shelli for some time. Then, he finally looks at my Facebook page and sees a picture of us. He says, “Yo, does your wife have a natural hair blog? I think I follow her.” We laughed about it for a heartbeat, but then he started to ask me a bunch of questions about products for his hair. I told him to check out the site and that everyone’s hair is different. So, that’s why I gave the bag to him!

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 See, we threw in a few full-size products from our stash too!

And, he’s gonna give me a few product reviews from a guy’s perspective!

Now, I know you are asking, so what did I do or get for Shelli? For her, the love of my life … I did something I have never done professionally. I took a picture … just for her! While on another gig, I sent her a picture to let people know I don’t look like the person she says people say I look like. And she gets a special super exclusive picture that I only share with her … and my mom … until now!

legendandwei

And I guess he’s taller than I thought and I’m shorter than I thought too!

The end.

SHiNE

 

CLAIMING SPACE: The Man Cave

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IAN_0224by Weusi

I looked back and saw that my first post of 2013 was about claiming space in the madness of a product junky’s bathroom. As we are almost half of the way through the year, and I review my vision and plan for 2014, I think there is a need for another Claiming Space post. This time, it’s about what is called …

“MAN CAVE” noun: humorous 1. a room or other part of a home regarded as a refuge for the man or men of a household.

It’s important that your home feels and looks like a space that you would want to live, BUT if a Man lives with a S.O. (Significant Other), then they know rule #1 is … Keep them Happy to Keep a Happy Home! This may mean that at any given time, when you look around, you may not realize that you even live in a space. This is, in part, due to the FACT that discussion about aesthetic conflicts are more than likely tabled (or trashed) because there will undoubtedly be “more important things to discuss.” Anyway … earlier this year, I visited a friend and he had a new man cave. The wall behind his comfy couch said, “Life is Beautiful.” Some of his other friends thought that this was a little too “soft” in the midst of the lounge chairs, flat screen, and booming bass heavy sound system. But, it made sense to me. It was the man cave of a married man. He’s a happily married man, and little touches like that remind you that there are other things in life that make you happy besides food, drinks, music, and sports. And this is important to remember in the midst of testosterone-filled man cave interactions.

There are a few simple reasons why having a man cave is a goal for me in upcoming months …

1. Solitude: I love Shelli’s smile and sometimes we man cave dwellers need to get away and find a place of comfort and inspiration … without distractions. You know how easily we can be distracted! And sometimes … you just want us to get out of your way!

2. Library: Real men read. ‘Nuff said! stacks of books 3. History: I think of a Man Cave as one of the places that will one day be a historic landmark. “The Office of Weusi Baraka.” “Weusi Baraka Slept Here.” The Man Cave is a museum space. It speaks to your interests, personality, and where the Smithsonian will come to collect archival pieces of one’s history. I want to be able to define how I will be remembered. I want a role in writing my history (see the Kwanzaa principle of Kujichagulia: self-determination).

My dream man cave is part office, part library, part music studio, and part creative laboratory. This sounds fancy, but in its simplest manifestation, this just means it’s a space that has a desk with a computer, pens and paper (I have my analog moments), books, speakers/good headphones, some space to pace and either a dry erase board or a chalkboard. A TV would be cool, but it can be a hindrance. Although a bar would be mandatory for most, there isn’t really a NEED for a bar or furniture because I don’t do well with entertaining, nor do I really enjoy it. I know to some this sounds weird, but I like to be alone at home. I’m kind of an oxymoronic social recluse?!?

I share all this with you because it is important that you know that when you share space with Significant Others and agree to a Man Cave, it’s not because we’re trying to avoid you … It’s because we love you so much that when we share space with you, you easily steal our focus. Sometimes we need to excuse ourselves from the presence of your spellbinding beauty so that we can get things in perspective. A smile is a helluva thing! Ok … and yes … sometimes, we do want to just get away and/or refuel our superpowers. We’re not asking for a Batcave! We just want a spot to go read, play a video game, and/or maybe watch a sport’s game!

BatmanArkhamAsylum_batcave pic(You know he’s reading an e-book in this picture right!?!)

SO … ask me about how my Man Cave planning is going in September!

Oh, and when I say I like to be alone … I mean alone … with Shelli! (We’re still honeymooning newlyweds … what do you expect?) IAN_0357

SHiNE

 

News Anchor Reveals Natural Hair

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newsanchorby Weusi

This is a salute to natural hair and to the strength of the human spirit. A quick reminder that being natural isn’t just about vanity for everyone, but it is a gift for those who choose to embrace it!

Please check out this 4 minute story …

SHiNE

Thank You … See You in 2014 …

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IAN_0355by Weusi

I have at least 5 notes and/or drafts of post to share with you all on the wedding and honeymoon and about life in general. The outpouring of love and support for Shelli/Hairscapades and our marriage has been beautiful and inspiring. Honestly, it’s a bit overwhelming. So let me simply say this to you all … THANK YOU.

Holler at you in 2014!

SHiNE,
Weusi

To Tiana …

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tiana_parkerby Weusi

Some of you have heard about the young lady that transferred schools because her locs became an issue at her prior school.

Honestly, after hearing about the story, my testosterone kicked in. I wanted to challenge the school’s board and their views of what an acceptable hairstyle is. I got into the language of the school’s policy. I wanted to reach out and dap up Tiana’s father for protecting his daughter. I wanted to start a conversation that would make people uncomfortable and agitate change. Then it hit me. What can I do for Tiana?

Then, like a ray of light, comes Dr. Yaba Blay …

A Care Package for Tiana: Locs of Love

A digital book for Tiana, with messages and pictures from dozens of sisters affirming the beauty, strength and wisdom of her natural hair.

A_Care_Package_for_Tiana(Give it a few secs to load after clicking the image.)

Check out the homie, Dr. Yaba Blay, she’s at the top of her game!

SALUTE TO YOU ALL!

SHiNE!