In my mind … I’ve been married for a long time. I’d committed myself to Shelli long ago. I didn’t need the government, our friends, or family to validate my love. God knew my heart and my commitment. Shelli also knew I was married … in my mind. I told Shelli all the time, “You’re my wife.” Not in a creepy, over-possessive, “it puts on the lotion” kinda way. Moreso, in a voice of reassurance. Letting her know that my love is forever and that I was committed and wasn’t going anywhere.
Because of my love and commitment to her, when she let me know that a legal marriage would make her happy, I didn’t fight it. I can’t say it was a no brainer though. In my mind, I’m a little revolutionary and can be kind of anti-establishment. When I realized how happy it would make her, I knew what had to be done. Then, on December 12, 2013, I did it. I said those words … “I DO.” And no, I didn’t go the Kevin Hart route and “say it with my chest,” but, I meant it with all my heart. I wake up daily and say it to myself as a reminder. But now what? What happens after “I DO?”
When I decided that I was getting married, I sought wisdom and advice from as many people as I could. I talked to a bunch of people, both male and female, about the dynamic that marriage brings to a relationship. Many of them said that after you say “I do” and the honeymoon is over, things change. And they said that we’ve got to work on learning how to evolve and grow as individuals and together as a unit. The great thing about that is, since we’re both people with positive spirits, positive change is inevitable! AND lucky for us, we plan to live the rest of our lives in a honeymoon like bliss!*
*please do not equate the honeymoon like bliss with ignorant bliss!
We’ll just have to wait to find out what happens as time goes on. We are 6 months in today and I’m ji like, still excited about it all! I’ll try to keep you posted on things, but y’all should let me know when you would like an update too. Until then (and forevermore), join us as we rejoice in love. And know that we are in honeymoon mode … eternally! At least in my mind!
(p.s. In case you were wondering, “ji like”is not a typo, it is slang for “jive like,” which is DC’centeric slang for “kind of like.”
AND … I’m sorry if you are getting tired of them but … I will continue to write pieces about and use pictures from our wedding … FOREVER! I LOVE SHOWING OFF OUR LOVE!
What a beautiful post. Happy semi – anniversary to you and Shelli!
Reading this made my morning. So beautiful…It’s nice to know that true unconditional love still exists.
*tears* All this awesomeness in one blog. Most men don’t like to share their personal life experiences with some of their real-life acquaintances, yet, you’re willing to share the joys of your life with the world. I enjoy reading your blogs and I learn something from each one I’ve read. Thank you for sharing. When I saw the email I thought, “Oh eM Gee, the Man Cave is complete ahead of schedule”. Lol…
Glad you clarified the “Ji” lolol… I didn’t know what it meant (wasn’t even sure if I pronounced it correctly), so, I ignored it lol.
May God continue to bless your union abundantly.
keep showing those pics! we don’t mind! 🙂
Thank you for sharing your love, you give the rest of us hope. May you stay together like Ruby Dee & Ossie Davis 🙂
Reading that just reignited my hope in receiving love from a man within a healthy relationship. THANK YOU!
Your male perspective is appreciated.
All the best…
Ahh… Congrats to you both. Yeah who says you can’t still stay in that after glow of the wedding hey hold on to it lol. & thanks for teaching us a new phrase. I love things like that. So funny how every region is different. & yes I did think it was a typo lol
Weusi, congrats to both of you. You know how much I love Shelli, and I’m so happy she has a wonderful husband like you to go through life with. I love your additions to Shelli’s blog. Keep ’em comin’. I’d do anything for my Shelli girl. She’s “ji like” one of my own girls. So that makes you “ji like” my son-in-law. Ha. Hugs to you both! XX (did I use that term correctly?)
I wish you both an ABUNDANCE of happiness and love !
Since you are from DC and using DC centric speak, throw in some ‘mug’ and ‘bama’.
My cousins from DC always say that.
Ex, man it was colder than a mug. Ex, man s/he looks like a bama.
Congratulations to you both! I met my hubs in 1983 and we married in 1985. Two young’uns and nearly 30 years later I have a list of things I’d wish I’d done differently.
Most important is to not take each other for granted. Neither of you are psychic, and before you speak – think – it is true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?
Please continue to travel the globe and enjoy the experience hand-in-hand!
This blog made my heart smile even brighter!!! I love to see real, true love!! We should all take this and run with it….. I mean… Who wouldn’t want to be in honeymoon mode eternally??? That’s what I thought….. I will reference this blog post every day of my marriage to my best friend, lover, confidant, my everything! Thank you for sharing and please continue to share because there are people/couples that need that reassurance that true love does exist and there are REAL MEN that aren’t afraid to show & express it! I so LOVE MY HUSBAND of 9 months!
~ Mrs. Coleman
Awwwwwww … thank you on both of our behalves!