You guys are familiar with the gorgeous and sweet Antoinette and Shanti, the curly beauties behind Around the Way Curls, right? Well, I met them at the Curly Nikki NYC meet-up this past summer.
I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship ;).
Well, a couple of weeks ago, Antoinette asked if I’d do an interview about me and “my boo.” LOL!! Well, of course I agreed!!! You guys often get to read about my relationship from Wei’s perspective through his feature, S.O. He Says. Now’s your chance to learn a little about my take on it and my thoughts on love ;)!
Check out my interview here!!
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One of the questions in the interview was:
My mother told me that every woman should have a list of non-negotiables when it comes to men and relationships. For example, he has to like and want children, he has to be independent and self sufficient and so on and so forth. Do you agree and if so, what were/are your non-negotiables? Or do you think having a list limits us and could potentially result in us missing out on someone great?
You read my thoughts on this. What are yours?
hairscapades 
Oh Shelli, I loved the interview! You dropped knowledge and I hope that it might benefit the masses. I have been married for nineteen years and I wholeheartedly agree with you that communication is the key. You definitely got my nod of approval…hats off to you and Wei.
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What an amazing interview Shelli!!! So open (but also reserved in a way). I’m a complete and utter sucker for love. Communication is sooo important. I’m in a long distance ‘relationship’ right now and we’re really trying to work things out. There’s no doubt about how we feel about each other but not seeing him kills me – every darn day! I don’t know what it is but he’s got me… I can’t stay mad at him. I hate fighting and our friendship means more to me, dare I say even more than the love we have for each other. Time will tell where our story goes… and I pray God directs our hearts accordingly.
You and Wei are an awesome couple and I wish you all love and happiness… that’s what it’s all about! x
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Hi Shelli! Thanks for giving us a sneak peek. In the infamous words of Wendy Williams “I love your love!” I wish you and Wei much happiness, lots of kids :-), and many years together.
To answer the question above, yes you should have a list of non-negotiables. The list should focus on core values and the character of your S.O. I agree with you Shelli, if the list focuses on superficial things it can work against you.
The key is writing it and putting it away, like you did and let nature take its course. Not whipping it out on every first day with a microscope 🙂
Please forgive any typos or grammatical errors. I’m typing with one hand and holding a sleeping baby with the other 🙂
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Hi Shelli – I have been with my Hubs since 1983. Yes, daggone near 30 years. I was young and wild and nearly lost myself trying to please others. We’ve had our ups and downs, but are still there for each other.
Young people should have a list of “non-negotiables”. If I could do it all over, DH would not likely make the cut! LOL!
It is what it is, so my advice is to google the lyrics to Warren Barfield’s “Love is not a fight” song.
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Great interview….an even greater woman…love is so wonderful when the circles clearly intersect and neither has to revolve around the other…the circles that you have developed and found leaves us (Mom and Dad) beaming with the warmth of the love of and for the two of you…the ray of light that you shine gives and confirms hope in tomorrow…Love ya both…and yes, I come to read you daily 🙂
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Aww! How beautiful, Mr. Gillis. I am a Daddy’s girl, so I thinks you’re the bee’s knees!!!
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Actually, this is my future father-in-law Tracy:). Isn’t that the sweetest:)? Awwww, love you too Dad:). Your love and caring are mean more to me than you know. I’m so happy to be a part of your family and the fact that you come “visit” us every day brings a smile to my face and heart:). HUGS!!!! I’ll call you today! I did get your message! Love you!
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Yes, that is the sweetest!!! Not only have you found the man of your dreams, but he has a wonderful family to boot? You’re a blessed woman, Shelli Beans!
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Hi Shelli.
Beautiful, intelligent, thoughtful interview. This gives me hope for the world. May your love grow stronger into the future. Blessings to both of you.
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Wonderful interview. You and Weusi go together like peanut butter & jelly – classic, compatible and satisfying! Hopefully we’ll see wedding photos in 2013.
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I absolutely LOVED your interview. While I haven’t had love in my life in a long time, I believe it is possible. After reading this interview, you have strengthened my belief that real, true, God-sent love can and does exist. I can’t express into words how much I wish for you and Wei to have a wonderful life together and to have all of your dreams come true.
As for the list, I have one and what surprises most who have read it is the lack of physical characteristics on it. Because I’m pretty easy-going, I try to remain open to new ideas and possibilities. However, some non-negotiables are: he must be a “saved” Christian in word and deed, he must have drive, he must practice good hygiene, he must have a sense of humor, and he must be tall (I’m 5’11).
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Thank you all for your kind words and personal stories and advice!! I read every single one. Sometimes it’s hard to balance writing new posts, emails and the social network stuff. But please know that every kind word, like, rating, words of encouragement, question, shout-out *lol* is like a diamond to me!!! I’ll try to come back this weekend and respond to each of you individually!! MWAH!!
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Aaawww you guys are so cute! Great (and honest) interview. I’ll catch you guys for the next natural hair meet up in NY! =)
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