Category Archives: Naturals Around the World

The stories of naturals or those transitioning to natural in the international community.

May16

Prissy’s HairStory

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Prissy’s HairStory

by Prissy of Black Hair in Paris

I am a new naturalista. But I never planned to be. I didn’t go for the big chop. I didn’t have a hair tragedy or develop an allergy to chemicals. I didn’t watch Chris Rock’s “Good Hair.” I came into the look I’ve always wanted simply by accident. Serendipity is my friend.

I got my first relaxer at 13. I tagged along with my aunt to the salon. While sitting there amazed at her glossy results, she asked me if I wanted one. I said yes, all gooey-eyed, and that experience led to me using chemicals for the next two decades. Before my relaxer, I got my hair “pressed” as folks back home call it. Every Saturday night we’d go to my grandparent’s and sit in the middle of the kitchen. I still remember my grandmother saying, “Grab your ear girl” and me cringing, hoping she wouldn’t slip and burn my finger. When she’d finished and all the smoke had gone, there we sat with our long hair reaching our shoulders. Happy. Proud. Ready for ribbons and church on Sunday.

Those were the days.

After I initially got my relaxer, I kept it simple until I reached 18. I was away at college and modeling part time. For one of the fashion shows, the organizers sent me to a hair stylist. She turned out to be a weave specialist and said, “Why don’t you try it, at least for the show?” I went from having a bob to being a diva overnight. That led to what I call my “Diana Ross Years.”

Afterwards, I wore long hair extensions (braided in, glued in, sewed in) off and on for several years. If I cut my hair and missed it, I’d go and get it weaved in again. If I simply got bored with my already long hair, I’d go and get even longer hair. Curly weaves were my kryptonite.

In 2006, I decided that length no longer mattered to me. I didn’t need super long hair. Not even long hair. I went for a super short bob and it was one of the best looks I’ve ever rocked. But then, I let my hair grow out and I was bored again. I returned to my old habits and went and got another weave. Sigh. The vicious cycle was hard to break. I finally got rid of it once and for all in 2009.

I was then expecting a bundle of joy. I didn’t want to go to the salon. I went for a long time without doing anything to my hair other than a simple shampoo and a pull back. After the baby came, I knew it was time to get my head taken care of. Nicole Pembrook of Polished Hair Care told me on my first trip back to the salon, “You know what? You don’t need a relaxer. I’m not putting one in. In fact you never needed one.”

WHAT?

I didn’t believe it. I’d had a relaxer since … forever. In the back of my mind I thought, “I’ll just try it out. She’ll see.” That day, I walked away with a shampoo and blow out. No one could tell that I didn’t have a relaxer. I would wear my hair blown out and flat-ironed for the next two years.

In December 2011, I was travelling home to America for Christmas. I had a weave specialist’s number. He was inexpensive and good. I didn’t want to go back to relaxers or weaves, but I wanted to change the texture. I wanted curly hair again. It turns out he wasn’t available (thank God!) so I decided to wash it myself. However, when I looked in the mirror afterwards, I didn’t recognize my own head: I had a head full of naturally curly hair.

It’s been two months since I had a blow out. My family, my friends, and most of all, ME love my new hair! The icing on the cake was when my daughter, who has curly hair too, looked at me, patted my hair and said, “Mom pretty hair.”

What more could a girl ask for? Absolutely nothing.

Feb29

Ebony: Natural in Brazil

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Ebony: Natural in Brazil

Who are you and from where do you hail?
My name is Ebony and I am 32 years old. Although I currently live in Sao Paulo, Brazil, I am originally from the Bahamas. My hair experiences at home are very similar to those expressed by Claudine in her post about Bermuda, so I’ll focus on my recent experiences as a natural in Brazil and previously, in Cairo.

I moved to Brazil last summer, after living in Cairo, Egypt for two years. Cairo, while full of culture and revolution, was not the easiest place for a single, Black woman to live. At first, when I was too preoccupied with not getting lost, I didn’t notice a lot else; I figured out local grocery stores, how to get to work and back and made a few friends. And then, I started paying attention to other things. Like, the way the sub-Saharan African woman were leered at, the way I was sometimes followed (and propositioned) by men on the street, the ex-pat men who fawned over all shades of brown as something exotic.

Please don’t get me wrong; as a general rule, Egyptians are great … but, as we all know, it only takes a few incidents to taint an experience. Because I am “light-skinned,” when my hair was straight, I could “pass” for Egyptian and I got less flack/more positive attention. But one of my best girlfriends, who wore her hair in braids, was often mistaken for being up for anything and had to frequently defend herself from physical harassment. It was as though the more “African” you looked, the bigger a target of derision and harassment you became. It was incredibly disappointing and demoralizing.

It’s with this experience that I moved, with relief, to Brazil; I reasoned that such a purportedly open culture would provide me with a much needed 180 to what I’d experienced. And I was right!

What has your natural hair journey been like? If you relaxed your hair at some point, why did you (or your guardian) make that decision?
I have been natural for over 10 years now, after having a relaxer for the 10 or so years prior to that (transitioned). A relaxer was the norm in the Bahamas and I thought it was a great treat when my mom finally allowed me to get my first ‘perm’ when I was 12. I do regret it; I should have listened to my parents who told me it was a bad idea. My little sister, by contrast, never got a perm and can now sport a beautifully full head of locs that will never be mine. Sigh.

My hair has always been fine, but I’m convinced that it was thicker back in the day. This is my biggest peeve about my hair, I think, that there’s so little of it … but we always want what we don’t have!  I don’t actually remember why I decided to grow out my relaxer, but it was probably either because I was tired of sitting in a salon. I like to be in and out.

What do you like most about your homeland?
What I enjoy most about being here is that women of all shapes, ages and races take pride in their appearances and wear what makes them feel comfortable (even if it may provoke others to look at them goggle eyed). I find this confidence and celebration of femininity so refreshing and healthy.

What do you see as the challenges of being natural in Brazil? Are there any things that you think are unique to where you live? If so, what and why? How do you think they can be overcome?
I haven’t found that the same sense of self-confidence that I talked about above translates to hair. Brazil is famous for the Brazilian Blowout, which combines keratin and formaldehyde in some crazy mixture so that you can wash and go or blow your own hair out more easily. When I was growing up, there was a saying, “If it can blow, you can go” and that is the sentiment here as well. Straight hair, the longer the better, is everywhere. The few exceptions to this are the women who have more of a natural wave and have lots of length; this seems acceptable.

But we all know that this hair-hateration isn’t anything new or unique to Brazil. But maybe the tide is turning? Just this month, Sony Music was ordered to pay over half a million dollars in compensation after releasing a “hair-ist” song in 1997; the song is all about a black woman who smells bad and has hair like a scouring pad (Google “Veja os Cabelos Dela [Look at Her Hair] for the full story).

Shelli: And/or you can check out the article on CurlyNikki here.

What is the hair norm for Black/Brown women where you live? If natural hair is not the norm, is it becoming more prevalent?
To be honest, there are not very many “visibly Black” women where I live, although almost everyone here has some brown in them. When I do see Black women out and about, I feel the urge to give them “the nod” as we pass each other (like Black folks do in US cities where they’re not in great numbers). These women are usually travelling to work as domestic help in affluent homes – but that’s another story – and tend to have relaxers, whether WnG or straight. I have seen only a handful of other naturals on the street and usually in an artsy context (street/artisan fair, music concert, etc.).

I should clarify that I live in São Paulo, which is the most formal/professional city in the country; people here tend to be more conservative than, let’s say, people from Rio. When I visited that city, I did see more naturals out and about, but still not as many as I would have expected. I’ve been told that I have to visit the north to get a better sense of the Afro-Brazilian community.

What is your regimen? Do you use/prefer commercial or natural products? Are the products that you like and want to try readily accessible and affordable? Where do you purchase them?
I tend to wear my hair in its curly form, but pulled back. Since people constantly comment on how young I look – which never sounds like a compliment in a professional setting – I tend not to wear my curls down. I did once and it sparked a huge reaction; people sought me out to tell me how much they loved my hair and that I should wear it out more often …the irony of it being that the majority of the women here straighten their own hair.

I’ve become more determined to get serious about maintaining my hair recently because, when I got to Brazil, my hair was falling out in clumps. At first, I wasn’t bothered. Then, when my husband started to agree that it was unusual, I went to see a dermatologist. A hormone imbalance meant that I was experiencing – wait for it – male pattern baldness.  She prescribed something to balance me out, super duper hair vitamins (containing keratin as a main ingredient) and a topical solution. Five months on, I’m beginning to see some of the hair grow back.

I wish that I could say I have a standard regimen, but I don’t. I try to use, as much as possible, organic hair care products, even if that means stocking up for the year when I travel to the US or UK. I sometimes pre-poo with EVOO and try to co-wash until I can’t take it anymore. I use some sort of leave-in regularly and sometimes use this old-school Alberta VO5 hairdressing crème that my aunt used to use back in the day. After reading Shelli’s posts on protein treatments, I’ve been looking up recipes for treatments I can whip up myself.

 Do you go to a salon?
When my hair needs a trim, I tend to take to it myself and then get my husband to even it out; he hates doing it for fear of messing up, but I’d rather take the chance than try to convince a Brazilian hair stylist that “yes, I really DO want you to cut off more than that.  t’s okay.  It’ll grow back.”

Who do you follow online? Anything else that you’d like to share?
Without having girlfriends to talk to face-to-face about hair, it’s been invaluable being a part of these online hair communities. In addition to Hairscapades, I also follow Black Women of Brazil , Black Girl with Long Hair, and have recently come across Gisella Francisca, a blog by a curly in Rio.

Thanks to Shelli and others for being so devoted to “the cause” and to you all for sharing so freely.

Tchau,
Ebony

Feb1

Carolina: Natural in the Dominican Republic

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Carolina: Natural in the Dominican Republic

Who are you and from where do you hail?
Hello everyone! My name is Carolina and I was born in the Dominican Republic. I lived most of my life in Boston, Massachusetts, but I am back in the DR and have been living and working here for over 2.5 years now.

What do you like most about your homeland?
I have to say that the beaches are my favorite part of my country. I also love fresh tropical fruits like mangos, coconut and papaya because, of course, I put them on my hair! The weather here is fantastic, especially since I grew up in one of the coldest states in the US, I really enjoy the heat!

What is the hair norm for Black/Brown women where you live? If natural hair is not the norm, is it becoming more prevalent?
Natural hair is definitely not the norm, quite the contrary. Relaxers, weaves and straight hair reign in the Dominican Republic. Natural hair is becoming more and more popular for sure though. When I went natural a few years ago, I remember seeing maybe three other naturals walking around the city. Now, when I go to the movie theater, the malls, the super market, everywhere I go, I see a natural head and I love it!

What was your hair like during your childhood and teen years? How did you feel about it? How was it perceived by others?
This is a really interesting question because I grew up in the US and my hair was perceived different there than it is here. During most of my childhood years and throughout my teenage years, I rocked relaxed hair, which was perceived by most of my African-American friends as “good hair.” I remember feeling like my hair was always a lot of work, but actually never questioned why I got relaxers, it was such a normal thing.

If you relaxed your hair at some point, why did you (or your guardian) make that decision? When and how long were you relaxed before you decided to go natural?
My mom decided to relax my hair because she claims it was too difficult to manage. I do have a lot of hair and if you are never taught to work with natural hair, the only known solution is relaxing it. I relaxed my hair for over 15 years until I decided to go natural.

What prompted your decision to go natural?
I was seriously just curious at first. I was also tired of going through that process every 2 months. I hated the hair salons, still do. I was ready to accept me for who I was, naturally. It was also an identity thing for me. I wanted to acknowledge and celebrate my blackness and wearing my kinky afro was one way of doing that.

Did you transition or big chop or are you currently transitioning?
I transitioned for less than 2 months and then got a BC. I couldn’t handle the two textures. There was a war in my head and the curls won!

What has your natural hair journey been like? How has your decision been received by family, friends and people in general?
I have to say that my natural journey has been really amazing! I have learned so much about myself and, most importantly, I have learned to love all of me. I have also met lots of interesting people through the different natural online networks. It is incredible, but I have “curlfriends” in Sweden, Brazil, Germany, Spain, Mexico, Columbia, Peru, Canada, USA, India, seriously all over the world!

My friends were super supportive, my family not so much. Some of them still think I’m either crazy or that I am going through a phase and will eventually get a relaxer!

What do you see as the challenges of being natural? Are there any things that you think are unique to where you live? If so, what and why? How do you think they can be overcome?
The most difficult part about being natural here in the DR is the constant harassment I face from complete strangers in the street to colleagues in my field. I have learned to choose my battles wisely and correct people when they say something disrespectful. The other day for example, a colleague noticed that I had flat-twisted my hair and said, “Oh, so you decided to comb your hair today.” I responded that the day my hair was out in a fro it was also “combed.”

Every so often, I talk to random women that say that I have “bad” hair and get them thinking a little about where it came from and why we still use that term. I’ve had some pretty amazing conversations with many different people about hair.

What is your regimen? Do you use/prefer commercial or natural products? Are the products that you like and want to try readily accessible and affordable? Where do you purchase them?
I don’t really have a set regimen, because I am constantly trying new products and new styles. I usually wash my hair twice a week, once with a sulfate-free shampoo (my favorite one right now is SheaMoisture the yellow bottle) and once with either a cleansing cream (CURLS) or co-wash (Tea Tree Tingle Trader Joes). I usually do twist-outs and Bantu knot-outs, but about twice a month I’ll rock a wash and go. Love natural oils and butters. At first, it was almost impossible to find natural hair products here in the DR, but now I run a small store and a few others are distributing different hair products.

Are there salons that cater to natural hair where you live? Are stylists trained in handling natural hair? Do you go to a salon?
Sadly, I don’t really know of any that work with natural hair and keep it in the natural hair form. I know of salons that work with straightening natural hair, but none that will give you a twist-out or natural hairstyles.

What do you enjoy and/or love about being/going natural? Has the journey taught you anything about yourself?
I enjoy so much about being natural. I love being able to embrace the rain, to shower without a shower cap, swimming in the ocean and pools and being able to love what I once thought was a bad hair day look. I have learned to really take care of all of me through this process. I usually put on my hair the same things that I put in my body and to me that is very important. Finally, I think this is an ongoing journey and I really hope to get the opportunity to write about being natural with grey hair from a personal view!

Do you have a Hair Crush?
I have so many hair crushes. Ok for one, YOU! Seriously, I love your buns and how you incorporate so many cute accessories into your styles. I think I have too many, but here are some of my fave blogger’s and famous people’s curls … DailyCurlz, HeyFranHey, Solange (natural wigs and all), Naptural85 (love her texture), Izzy (fearless Elle from Questfortheperfectcurl) Chescaleigh (love her locs), Esperanza Spalding, Lola (Cassidy from naturalselectionsblog) and my friend’s Tasmy and Paloma curls (Gringa Loca Productions).

Who do you follow online?
I follow everyone and their mommas! I follow a lot of the women I mentioned above. If you would like to follow me I’m everywhere too …on Twitter: @Miss_Rizos; on Facebook: Miss Rizos; blog: www.missrizos.com.

You’ll also find my co-hosting every so often on Nappturalite Radio!

Anything else that you’d like to share?
Just embrace you, all of you, straight hair, curly hair, just start loving yourself!

Jan25

Natural in Germany: Laxmi’s HairStory

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Natural in Germany: Laxmi’s HairStory

by Laxmi of LuckyCurls.com

Who are you and from where do you hail? Please tell us a little about where you live.
Hello, my name is Laxmi (the Hindus pronounce it ‘Lakshmi’). I’m a mother to two awesome little girls, a wife, English teacher and Entrepreneur.

I am originally from Ghana, went to college at USF in Tampa (Go Bulls! *lol*) and I’ve been living in Karlsruhe, Germany since the summer of 2006. Karlsruhe is found in the state of Baden-Wuerttemberg’ and is located in the southwestern part of Germany, between Frankfurt and Stuttgart and close to the French border. It is shaped like a fan and this is because the founder of the city, “Karl,” apparently took a nap (ruhen- to relax) and dreamt of a city shaped like a fan – hence the name “Karlsruhe,” which loosely translated means “Karl’s rest.”

Karlsruhe Schloss, "The Castle"

This next picture is my street. I love my neighborhood, the west side or “weststadt” as it’s called here. It’s within walking distance to the downtown area or a couple of tram stops away from everything fun and interesting.

Germany, and Karlsruhe in particular, is a very orderly place. Everything works like clockwork over here. Coming from Ghana where almost everything is chaotic, and being a bit of a chaotic person myself, it’s good to have calm surroundings where everything works like it’s supposed to.

It’s very green over here and people are very “outdoorsy”/really into nature.

During the summer, the street side cafes and famous beer gardens open up, everything just looks so picturesque. This next picture is one of Karlsruhe’s landmarks, The Pyramid at the Marktplatz. This is the center of the city and the tombstone of the founder of the city.

This last picture is one of the things for which Germany is known – yummy bread and pretzels :) !

I know that you have an online shop for curly/natural hair products. Please tell us a little about that.
I recently started an online shop called luckycurls.com, because Germany is lacking when it comes to good, quality products geared towards naturally curly hair. I want to introduce German curlies to a better sortiment of hair products. My shipping rates are for Germany, but anyone outside of Germany can just e-mail me via laxmi@luckycurls.com, so that I can provide the shipping rate for their country. I usually tell people to check their country first for products because international shipping rates are crazy expensive :-) !

I also have a German/English blog attached (blog.luckcycurls.com) and I make a few updates during the week on what is going on with my hair and that of my daughters. I need to blog more often, but I’m hoping to be a resource here for other curlies, as well as moms with bi-racial and African kids who often have hard time dealing with their kids’ hair.

What has your natural hair journey been like? How has your decision been received by family, friends and people in general?
I have been 100% natural since June of 2011. I transitioned for a year and decided to start my 30th year with the big chop :) and it felt so good to do that. I couldn’t stop touching me hair for, like, a week afterwards. Being a natural in Germany is great because everyone assumes that it’s normal/natural for one to want to wear their natural hair.

I have to say kudos to the curlies in the U.S. who big chop and everyone else that has to deal with negative comments and still continues to wear their hair with pride. I have wondered at times if I would have been so confident to rock my natural hair after my BC if I’d been in the States or in Ghana, my homeland. I’m glad I never had to find out. I’ve received nothing but compliments from family and friends since cutting my hair over here and I’m happy about that.

What prompted your decision to go natural?
The decision to go natural happened for a number of reasons, the first being that, I wanted to set a good example for my daughters. Prior to that, I was on a “long hair journey” and was learning how to properly take care of relaxed hair to retain length. That worked, but around that time, I started seeing more and more info on natural hair care just popping up everywhere :) ! I stumbled upon CurlyNikki and read a lot on natural hair care and that was the final push that I needed. I can only say, I wish I’d done it sooner.

What do you see as the challenges of being natural? Are there any things that you think are unique to where you live? If so, what and why? How do you think they can be overcome?
I’ve got cousins and friends from Ghana who see photos of my hair on Facebook and the blog and compliment and say they would like to go natural too. So, I try to encourage anyone who shows interest. I don’t get pushy about it, I just give them the info that I have if they ask.

We had to cut our hair in high school in Ghana to TWAs, but it is expected of you to relax your hair when you’re out of school. I’m not really sure how to explain it. It’s almost like a right of passage, like something that distinguishes you from “the kids.” Although there are kids with relaxers too, I had my first one at age 12 and I had to beg my mom for a long time before she finally gave in. Just like America, the notion that relaxed hair and weaves are prettier than our natural hair, strongly prevails in our culture, but I have hope that it will change in the future.

What is your regimen? Do you use/prefer commercial or natural products?
My hair care routine consists of shampooing once a week and then deep conditioning (either before or afterwards). My favourite shampoos and conditioners are from the Aubrey Organics and Jessicurl line. They work really well for me and my daughters. I follow that with Kinky Curly Knot Today; if I’m not being lazy, I do the kimmaytube leave-in method. Then, I detangle, spray my hair with my glycerin/rosewater mix and seal with coconut oil in the summer and homemade whipped shea butter in the winter. Afterwards, I twist my hair (I can’t wear my hair in an afro unless I want to battle knots and tangles later on).

I used to think that the glycerin/rosewater mix was only good for the summer, but I started using it this winter after reading an interesting blog post on it by JC of ‘The Natural Haven.” As long as you dilute it with enough water, you don’t have anything to worry about. Sometimes, I also do the so-called “Oyin method,” which is spray my hair with my mix before taking a shower. The steam from the shower activates the glycerin and this keeps the hair well moisturized. At night, I sleep with a silk scarf, as a result, my husband calls me “The Pirate.” *lol*

Anything else that you’d like to share?
For anyone out there interested in going natural, I’d suggest researching how to properly care for natural hair, get to know your hair and do what works for you, because once you learn to respect your curls, you’ll never have a bad hair day :) . Thanks.

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If you’re in Germany and having a hard time finding the curly/natural hair products that you want, don’t check out luckycurls.com! Maybe Laxmi will have just what you need!





Jan17

Natural in France: Kenoa’s HairStory

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Natural in France: Kenoa’s HairStory

I'm not a fan of taking pictures of me!

Who am I?
I’m Kenoa, from the French hair blog www.kinkyfrizzycurly.blogspot.com. I was born and raised in France, in what people called the most romantic city in the world … Paris. Paris is like a big open museum. The center of Paris has great architecture and every spot is a reminder of the French History: Notre-Dame, Sacré-Coeur, Eiffel Tower, Arc de Triomphe.


However, what I like the most about France is the food! Croissant, baguette and little “patisseries” are what I miss the most when I’m abroad.

I’m from the French Caribbean. Most of us are of African descent, mixed with French Whites, who came to the island between the XVIth and XIXth century to make a fortune by making deported African slaves work for free in their agricultural plantations…

Ok… That’s it for the historical flashback; let’s go back to my story now…

Childhood:
I loved my hair ! As a kid, I was constantly told by my very-proud-to-be-Black family that my hair was beautiful. My mother would style my hair every morning and every evening with great pleasure, so much so that you could see sparkles of admiration in her eyes when she was combing it (maybe I’m exaggerating a bit, but that was the impression I had back then!!). So, I was really happy with my hair. Everything was perfect!!

Teen years:
I didn’t accept myself and started to relax my hair. As I grew up and had to go to school, I had to evolve outside of my “black community.” Things began to become tough when my classmates would make fun of my hair and make jokes about Black people. You have to know that in France, we don’t have strong anti-racism laws like yours in the US; everyone can just come and say almost whatever they want about your race and not be punished. Racist jokes are considered just that … jokes.

All of this started to really bother me at high school, since I was the only Black person in my entire class. I found it hard to accept myself. My “White” friends circle was clearly not accepting me the way I was!

As I was searching for acceptance I began to “crave” for a relaxer. My mum was of course fiercely against it. To reach an agreement, she brought me with her to the hairstylist to have my hair pressed. That first experience at the hairstylist was not pleasant at all! The lady was manipulating my hair like it was some old dirty clothes. I could see in her eyes that she was totally in despair. She was smiling, but her eyes were saying “Oh how will I be able to manage this?!?” Today, I think it was a funny situation, but at that time it was really embarrassing. Later, when I was 17, my mum gave up. I finally had what I wanted: A RELAXER!

Adulthood:
When I entered the corporate world, I relaxed my hair every 2 months. As you can guess, my hair started to break off, became very dry, thin, dull, with tons of split ends.

When I realized how damaged and ugly my hair was, I decided to learn how to take care of my relaxed hair properly. I discovered blogs like this one, read books and research papers about hair. But I had no intention of quitting relaxing. Not at all!

How my husband helped me with my transition:
Then came the moment when I had to relax my roots again. This time, my husband would not let me do it. He was talking about how it was a denial of myself, a denial of my origins and that I was much more beautiful with my natural hair. At the beginning, I was like, “Is he serious, it’s just hair?!” We really had many discussions about it, until I came to agree with him. Then, I made up my mind to transition to natural hair at the end of 2010.

I know making your partner accept your natural hair can be a problem for some girls. But a lot of men prefer natural hair by far. And if your lover really loves you, he should be able to accept the natural you!

Transitioning : A change of mindset?
At work, most of my colleagues are White and the days I was relaxing my hair, I always received lots of compliments. Relaxing my hair was more “socially” acceptable for them.

As soon as I realized I was rejecting myself by relaxing my hair, I was convinced that I would stay natural all my life. I don’t want to ever go back to relaxers again. I think that if we don’t stand up and prove that our hair is great and beautiful, nobody will do it for us. I want people like my co-workers to think differently. It’s our responsibility to make them know that thinking of kinky hair as less beautiful than straight hair is wrong. But, in order to be able to embrace that responsibility, we have to believe in the beauty of our hair.

I’m not an anti-relaxer/pro-natural activist though … don’t misjudge me .. I think everybody should accept themselves the way they are, without being afraid of what others think.

How is it like to grow natural hair in Paris?
Paris is a multicultural city. Paris is crowded! We don’t have as many options as Blacks in the US, but we can easily find products for Black hair, Black beauty shops and hair salons for Blacks. It’s not as easy for people living outside of Paris.

I would say the social life in Paris is less “community-centered” than in the US (I lived in the US for a year, and it seemed difficult to have friends outside your own community, much more than in Paris). However, Blacks are not well represented in politics, media and in the corporate world in France … much less than Black Americans are in their country.

Having heard of naturals and transitioners journies from both locations, it seems that we are facing the same issues: bad experience with hairstylists, low self-acceptance of kinky hair, difficulties being taken seriously with kinky hair, little knowledge of how to properly take care of our own hair, tendency to copy Caucasian standards of beauty …

What is particular in my journey is that, at the beginning, I liked my hair, like everyone should. Plus, my mother took good care of my hair. She was doing the right stuff: moisturizing my hair every day, washing it every week, cutting my ends from time to time, low-manipulation hairstyles, praising the natural beauty of my hair … And still, I had to struggle with the same issues as anyone who wouldn’t have had all that!

It only reveals that society has a big influence, especially on young adults. Despite my family support, I couldn’t resist the pressure from my classmates and co-workers. It’s important that we tell our children that they have beautiful hair, like my mum did. But it is also necessary that society changes its view on kinky hair. And this will come, I think, with more and more “kinky hair” people wearing their hair with pride.

♦

FRENCH VERSION :

Qui suis-je ?
Je suis Kenoa, auteur du site pour cheveux crépus www.kinkyfrizzycurly.blogspot.com. Je suis née en France et j’ai grandi dans la ville que tout le monde qualifie de « ville la plus romantique du monde »… Paris. Paris est comme un grand musée à ciel ouvert. Le centre de Paris possède une architecture magnifique et chaque endroit est un rappel de l’histoire française : Notre-Dame, Sacré-Coeur, la Tour Eiffel, l’Arc de Triomphe…

Pourtant ce que j’aime le plus en France, c’est la nourriture ! Les croissants, la baguette et les petites pâtisseries sont les choses qui me manquent le plus quand je suis à l’étranger.

Je viens des Antilles françaises. Nous sommes de descendance africaine, mélangés à des blancs, venus dans l’île entre le XVIème et le XIXème siècle pour faire fortune en faisant travailler gratuitement des esclaves africains déportés sur leurs plantations.

Ok… c’est tout pour le flashback historique, retournons à mon histoire maintenant…

La petite enfance :
J’aimais mes cheveux ! Enfant, ma famille, très fière d’être noire, me répétait constamment que mes cheveux étaient beaux.

Ma mère les coiffaient tous les matin et tous les soirs avec grand plaisir, à tel point que je pouvais voir des étoiles d’admiration dans ses yeux quand elle les peignait (j’exagère peut-être un peu, mais c’est l’impression que j’avais à l’époque !). J’étais donc ravie de mes cheveux. Tout était parfait !!

L’adolescence :
J’avais du mal à m’accepter et j’ai commencé à défriser mes cheveux. En grandissant j’ai du aller à l’école et apprendre à évoluer en dehors de ma communauté noire. Les choses ont commencées à devenir difficiles quand mes camarades de classe se moquaient de mes cheveux et faisaient des blagues sur les noirs. En France, il n’existe pas de lois anti-racistes fortes comme les vôtres aux US. Les gens peuvent dire ce qu’ils veulent sur votre race et ne pas être inquiétés. Les blagues racistes sont considérées comme des blagues normales.

Tout ça a commencé à vraiment me déranger au lycée, surtout que j’étais la seule noire de ma classe. J’ai alors eu du mal à m’accepter. Mon cercle d’amis blancs ne m’acceptait pas comme j’étais de toute façon !

En quête d’acceptation, j’ai commencé à « rêver » de défrisage. Ma mère était bien-sur contre. Le compromis que nous avons trouvé toutes les deux était de m’emmener chez le coiffeur pour me lisser les cheveux. Cette première expérience chez le coiffeur n’a pas été des plus agréables. La femme manipulait mes cheveux comme s’il était de vieux vêtements sales. Elle souriait mais je pouvais lire dans ses yeux le désespoir « comment vais-je faire pour m’occuper de tout ça ! ». Aujourd’hui je trouve ça marrant. Mais à l’époque c’était franchement embarrassant. Plus tard, à 17 ans, ma mère a lâché prise. J’ai eu enfin ce que je voulais : un DÉFRISAGE !

Une fois dans le monde du travail, je défrisais tous les 2 mois. Comme vous pouvez l’imaginer, mes cheveux sont devenus cassant, très secs, fins, mous et pleins de fourches.

Quand je me suis aperçue à quel point mes cheveux étaient abimés et moches, j’ai décidé d’en prendre soin correctement. J’ai découvert pleins de blogs comme celui-ci, lu des livres et des articles de recherche sur les cheveux. Mais, je n’avais pas du tout l’intention d’arrêter le défrisage !

Comment mon mari m’a aidé à transitionner :
Puis un jour, au moment de défriser mes racines, mon mari a insisté que je ne défrise plus mes cheveux. Il parlait de rejet de moi-même, de mes origines et du fait que j’étais beaucoup plus belle avec mes cheveux naturels.

Au début, j’ai pensé « il est sérieux là ? Ce ne sont que des cheveux ! ». On a eu de nombreuses discussions sur le sujet, et petit à petit je me suis mise à partager son avis. J’ai alors décidé de transitionner fin 2010.

Je sais que faire accepter à son partenaire ses cheveux naturels peut être un problème pour certaines femmes. Mais, beaucoup d’hommes préfèrent de loin les cheveux naturels. Et si votre amoureux vous aime vraiment, il devrait pouvoir accepter votre vraie nature.

La transition : un changement d’état d’esprit ?
Au travail, la plupart de mes collègues sont blancs. Les jours où je me défrisais les cheveux, je recevais pleins de compliments de leur part. Pour eux, le défrisage me rendait plus acceptable socialement parlant.

Dès que j’ai compris que je me rejetais moi-même en défrisant mes cheveux, J’ai été convaincue que je resterais naturelle toute ma vie. Je ne veux plus jamais retourner au défrisage. Je pense que si nous ne montrons pas que nos cheveux sont magnifiques et beaux, personnes ne le fera à notre place. Je veux que des personnes comme mes collègues pensent différemment. C’est de notre responsabilité de leur faire savoir que les cheveux crépus ne sont moins beaux que des cheveux raides. Mais pour ce faire, encore faut-il croire en la beauté de nos cheveux.

Je ne suis pas une militante pro-naturel / anti-défrisage. Je pense que chacun devrait pouvoir s’accepter comme il est, en dépit du regard des autres.

C’est comment de vivre avec des cheveux naturels à Paris ?
Paris est une ville multiculturelle. Paris est blindé de monde ! Nous n’avons pas autant d’options que vous les noires aux US, mais on peut facilement trouver des produits pour nous, des enseignes de beauté noire et des salons de coiffure spécialisés. Ce n’est cependant pas aussi facile pour celles qui vivent en province.

La vie social à Paris est moins centrée sur les « communautés » qu’aux US (J’ai vécu aux US un an et il m’a semblé difficile de se faire des amis en dehors de sa communauté, plus qu’à Paris). Par contre, les noirs sont moins bien représentés dans sur les scènes médiatiques, politiques et dans les entreprises que les afro-américains le sont dans leur pays.

Ayant lu les aventures capillaires de personnes des deux pays, la France et les US, il apparait que nous avons les mêmes problèmes : mauvaises expériences avec les coiffeurs, faible acceptation des cheveux crépus, difficultés à être pris au sérieux, peu de connaissance sur la manière correcte de prendre soin de nos cheveux, tendance à copier les standards de beauté caucasiens…

En effet, ce qui est particulier dans mon histoire, c’est que j’aimais mes cheveux au début, comme tout le monde devrait. De plus, ma mère a bien pris soin d’eux. Elle faisait tout correctement : hydrater mes cheveux tous les jours, les laver toute les semaines, tailler mes pointes de temps en temps, coiffures à faire manipulation, faire l’éloge de la beauté de mes cheveux…
Et pourtant, j’ai du faire face aux mêmes difficultés que quelqu’un qui n’aurait pas eu tout ce que j’ai eu !

Pour moi, c’est révélateur de l’énorme influence qu’à la société, surtout sur les jeunes adultes. En dépit du soutien de ma famille, je n’ai pas résisté à la pression de mes camarades de classes et de mes collègues. 
Il est donc important, non seulement de dire à nos enfants que leurs cheveux sont beaux, comme ma mère l’a fait. Mais, c’est aussi nécessaire que la société change sa perception des cheveux crépus. Et je pense que cela viendra quand de plus en plus de personnes porteront fièrement leurs cheveux crépus !

Jan9

Claudine: Natural in Bermuda

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Claudine: Natural in Bermuda

Remember Claudine’s Henna and Me HairStory? Well here’s Part II of her HairStory as part of our new natural hair interview feature, Naturals Around the World!!

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Hi again. My name is Claudine and it is a beautiful, sunny day in Bermuda today! I climbed a ladder to take the pictures … never had done that before *LOL*!

All Bermuda houses have white roof tops because we catch the rain water from the roof into our
water tanks which are underneath our houses.

Natural Hair Environment in Bermuda

Prior to about 5 years ago, the majority of the naturals wore locs. Non-loc’d naturals seemed to have picked up momentum in the last two years. I would say that Bermuda is probably at the beginning stages of embracing kinky natural hair.

Transitioning and Product Access Challenges

Nearly three years ago, when I had decided to go natural after transitioning for 1 1/2 years, my former black male hairdresser at an upscale hair salon cut my relaxed hair off. He didn’t have a clue of how to work with 100% naturally kinky hair and all he was talking about was me getting a chemical texturizer (instead of admitting that he doesn’t work with natural kinky hair!!). So, I was disappointed with the results … and never returned.

I had transitioned using the Miss Jessie’s hair products … would you believe that I was paying $80, $75 and $65, respectively, for the Baby Buttercreme, Curly Pudding or Curly Meringue and Rapid Recovery? Our Bermuda dollar is at par with the American dollar. I continued using the Baby Buttercreme when I went natural, keeping my hair in two strand twists and wearing a twist-out the day before I washed my hair. My goal was to grow long natural hair without chemicals and non-loc. At that time, Miss Jessie’s was the only brand sold in Bermuda suitable for kinky hair.

I’ve had to resort to researching online and making purchases online of hair products for kinky hair. I tried the Kinky-Curly, Uncle Funky’s Daughter, Curls and then Qhemet Biologics hair products via online purchases. One of our major pharmacies (Black-owned) now carries some of the popular kinky hair products such as Curls, Kinky-Curly, Uncle Funky’s Daughter and Jane Carter Solutions. They started about 1 1/2 years ago with Curls, a year ago with Kinky-Curly and this Fall 2011 with Uncle Funky’s Daughter and Jane Carter. It was frustrating that the products were flying off the shelves and it would be months before the pharmacy replenished their stock!!

Shelli: Are the prices still very high compared to the costs here or are they comparable?
Yes, the prices are still very high. That’s because Bermuda shopkeepers imports their goods and they have to pay Government customs duty; and then they have to mark-up to make a profit. For the Curls Whipped Cream, I pay $26.95 a jar. I tried to see if it was cheaper for me purchase online and ship it to Bermuda. It cost me more to bring it in myself by the time I pay the shipping fee and the duty. That’s why it makes more sense for me to purchase items online, only if they don’t carry it in Bermuda.

Shelli: Wow, that is just crazy that you have to spend so much more!! Have you tried natural butters and oils as an alternative? Just wondering if you tried oil/butter mixes and they didn’t work or just haven’t gone that route.
I’ve tried 100% jojoba oil and 100% coconut oil. Between the two oils, neither one of them absorbs into my hair, but the coconut oil gives my hair a wonderful glossy sheen. I think I have a heavy hand in applying the oil in my hair as I always have to put a towel on my pillow at night, because the oils always soak through my head scarf or bonnet for the first two days. From my observation, I guess I shouldn’t be using the oils alone as if they are styling products to obtain curl definition … duh! LOL! But I certainly need to look for ways to stretch the Curls Whipped Cream. I’ve just started trying the “Kimmaytube leave-in conditioner” under the Curls Whipped Cream … that result … was not bad at all. My twist-out hair did not stay elongated, it went into a curly afro, but my hair stayed soft and moisturized.

For the Kimmaytube leave-in I use KC Knot Today, fresh aloe leaf which grows wild in some parts of Bermuda (and it is a lot of work to scrape the slime from the inner leaf part … the inner fillet part does not dissolve and the pieces look like gel balls in your hair that you have to pick them out!), 2 tsp Qhemet Biologics Castor & Moringa serum (I must check the Caribbean Market to see if they sell the Jamaican Black Castor Oil) and 2 tsp jojoba oil.

In regard to henna, I wouldn’t be surprised if I am the only natural who has used BAQ henna in Bermuda, but I might have company soon, as I have a cousin who’s hair is natural wants to try it.

Cutting/Trimming and Salons

I trim my own hair on the beneficial days as per the “lunar hair cutting calendar.” I have not had any success with hairdressers here in Bermuda. One female hairdresser (whose hair is chemically texturized), trimmed my hair in 4 large sectioned chunks … girl I am not lying … and then charged me $85 and insisted that I should get my hair chemically texturized!!! After this, I vowed never to set foot in that particular salon again.

Most recently, in Aug 2011 when I got my grays colored, the hair dresser’s assistant tried to untangle my hair in its dry state before washing it … girl, I thought to myself that she’s a little stupid. These hairdressers really don’t know anything about caring for natural hair.

So, I am now a DIYer when it comes to maintaining my hair as I am determined to grow my natural hair long. I like my God-given natural hair and have taken on the challenge in mastering the ultimate care of my hair, with a limited choice of hair products suitable for kinky hair which can be purchased locally. I used relaxers in my hair for 24 years and always wore my hair long, just at the lower part of my shoulder blade.

My Regimen

At present, I co-wash my hair once a week, try to deep-condition every two weeks and clarify shampoo and henna once a month. I am not so creative with my hair … just do two strand wet twists and then twist-outs when dried; every now and then I will do bantu-knot twist outs.

I have been using the Curls line for nearly 2 years and just last month, I began trying out the Qhemet Biologics line. I am not fussy about Qhemet. I prefer the Curls overall.

Shelli: Anything else that you’d like to add?
I like the idea of your site containing global hair perspective! I’ve heard of a group on FB called Thirsty Curlz, which was started for Bermudian naturals. I don’t use Facebook, so I haven’t seen it for myself. LOL … you must be saying who doesn’t have Facebook in this day in age :-) ! If you are able to join, you can probably obtain more information on a variety of Bermudian experiences with natural hair.

Jan8

Naturals Around the World

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Naturals Around the World

Natural in …

Last month, I re-blogged a post that blew up everywhere! It was written by Chy’s Curlz and  it was about the African vs. African-American Natural Hair Practices. I re-blogged it, then CurlyNikki and finally BGLH and a firestorm of comments ensued! It became one of the 10 most viewed posts on BGLH of 2011!!! Anyway, after reading the post on my site, a Facebook friend prompted me to really think about the international community of Black/Brown women who have their own hair journeys and experiences. She was especially excited about the opportunity we have, in this age of the internet, to share information around the globe.

So, I began developing this idea about how Hairscapades could become a platform for  those in the international community who are contemplating going natural, transitioning or are already fully natural. I thought about how I could make this a space where everyone can share their stories, their challenges and their successes and also provide this from the perspective of their cultural experience. I figured these insights might help broaden all of our understanding, as well as serve as inspiration for those within and without the storyteller’s corner of the world. Finally, I contemplated how I could develop Hairscapades into a resource for information that isn’t limited to the United States of America.

It’s a work in progress, but I have a few questions now because of a few great ladies who have already submitted their “free-form” stories (those will be posted in the upcoming weeks). I’m still putting together other ideas, but this is what I’ve come up with so far!

Naturals Around the World HairStory Questions

Who are you and from where do you hail?

What do you like most about your homeland (attach a picture or two that give a feel for your city and/or country /show a favorite place)?

What is the hair norm for Black/Brown women where you live? If natural hair is not the norm, is it becoming more prevalent?

What was your hair like during your childhood and teen years? How did you feel about it? How was it perceived by others?

If you relaxed your hair at some point, why did you (or your guardian) make that decision? When and how long were you relaxed before you decided to go natural?

What prompted your decision to go natural?

Did you transition or big chop or are you currently transitioning?

What has your natural hair journey been like? How has your decision been received by family, friends and people in general?

What do you see as the challenges of being natural? Are there any things that you think are unique to where you live? If so, what and why? How do you think they can be overcome?

What is your regimen? Do you use/prefer commercial or natural products? Are the products that you like and want to try readily accessible and affordable? Where do you purchase them? 

Are there salons that cater to natural hair where you live? Are stylists trained in handling natural hair? Do you go to a salon? (If you’d recommend it, provide contact info, including stylists name.) 

What do you enjoy and/or love about being/going natural? Has the journey taught you anything about yourself?

Do you have a Hair Crush?

Who do you follow online?

Anything else that you’d like to share?

OPTIONAL: Provide your story in your country’s national language!

So, that’s it. I’m open to other suggestions though and would love to hear your thoughts on other questions that you’d like answered or those you think that I can eliminate!

Ultimately, my goal is to present diverse perspectives on Hairscapades. So, if you have a story that you’d like to share, please e-mail it to me at hairscapades@gmail.com, with 4-6 pictures of your hair and a pic or two of your city/region/country, with the subject, ”Around the World.”

And stay tuned tomorrow for our first “official” Naturals Around the World HairStory, “Claudine: Natural in Bermuda!”

Dec29

Henna and Me: Claudine’s HairStory

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Henna and Me: Claudine’s HairStory

Describe yourself in 100 words or less.
Hi, my name is Claudine.  I live on the “bermudaful” island of Bermuda out in the Atlantic Ocean.

How long have you been natural?
I have been natural (no relaxer or texturizer applied) for 3 years coming up January 2012. I transitioned for about 1 1/2 years before cutting off the relaxer in January 2009.

How long have you been using henna? When did you start?
I am a newbie with henna. I started using henna on 22nd Oct 2011 and again on 29th Oct 2011.

What made you begin using henna?
I used to have my hair professionally colored with permanent dyes and found that my hair was dry; and also felt as if I was still getting a relaxer because the color process used to have that same burning sensation. Therefore, I was defeating the purpose of not having chemicals applied to my scalp and hair. So, I stopped getting my hair colored for over 1 year. I have a lot of gray at the front sides of my head, practically white and I am just 45 years old! A good friend of mine made a comment about me being too young to be walking around with all those grays on my head! So, I got my hair colored once again professionally with a semi-permanent dye in a cherry color on 23rd Aug 2011, thinking it should be less damaging and less chemicals. I couldn’t have been more wrong! I had a slight burning sensation and that smell of ammonia in my hair that took a long time to go away. The color faded to a bronze colour after 1 1/2 months. I made up in my mind that there has to be a natural coloring process for gray hair out there somewhere. So I started searching. After a few weeks of searching, I had come across Curly Nikki’s henna stories and also read about your henna experience on Curly Nikki’s website too! I was inspired … and then researched the henna process on www.hennaforhair.com and www.mehandi.com before taking a leap of faith to try the henna process.

How would you describe your first experience with henna?
I almost did not have enough henna applied by the time I reached my hairline. It was a messy job and I thought I was well prepared due to a thorough research utilising Curly Nikki’s website, your henna experience on Curly Nikki’s website, YouTube henna videos and the hennaforhair website. I left it in overnight and the henna felt so heavy on my head the next day that I couldn’t wait to rinse it out. ”Oh what a relief it was” when I rinsed out the henna! LOL! I was impressed with how my hair felt texture wise. My gray was a bright pumpkin orange color. Thank God my whole head was not gray as I could have easily been called a carrot head :D ! I didn’t know any better about keeping the gloves on during the styling process after rinsing out the henna … therefore my hands and fingernails got dyed a pumpkin orange! Just in time for Halloween …

What type of henna do you use? What is your mix? What is your process?
I use the Rajasthani Twilight henna (080111) purchased from www.mehandi.com. In my mix: I use 300g Rajasthani henna, 2 4 oz bottles of Sicilia Lemon Juice, 2 cups distilled water to make a thick mash potato consistency henna paste. I let this sit at room temperature for 12 to 16 hours for the dye release. When I am about ready to apply the henna, I wash my hair with a clarifiying shampoo (by Curls or Qhemet Biologics). While the shampoo is in my hair, I section my hair into twelve sections (6 at the front and 6 in the back), detangle each section with my fingers and then two-strand twist each detangled section. I rinse out the shampoo with the twists left in. Then I towel wrap my hair for about 15 minutes to take out excess water. In the meantime, while my head is wrapped in the towel, I add apple juice to the henna paste, stirring in just enough juice to make it of a yoghurt consistency. I apply the henna in sections starting at the back to the front, untwisting each hair section as I go. I leave the henna paste in my hair overnight (first wrap my hair with Saran Wrap, second put on two conditioning caps and then third wrap my head with the Diva Turban towel).

How often do you henna?
I did my third full head henna on 10th Dec 2011. I plan on doing a monthly henna gloss and doing full strength henna touch-ups on my new growth as needed (depending on how fast my hair grows).

How has your hair changed with henna?
The henna has enhanced my hair tremendously in such a short time! My curls are now somewhat looser and my hair texture is smoother and has volume that I’ve never had before. When I wear my hair in twists, they swing when I move my head, and this is as the result of the henna making my hair heavier.  One of my co-workers commented that it looks like I have pretty hair now.  “Pretty hair” is our Bermudian terminology in comparison to the American “Good hair” terminology.  But I personally believe that all natural hair types are “Good hair,” no matter the texture.

How do you feel about henna and the process now?
I love it, love it and love it some more! I feel so proud of myself to accomplish a hair color that is unique to my hair naturally and  that it cannot be duplicated by anyone else because there are no two heads of hair identical to one another. The process is very long, but it surely is worth the hours of waiting to see the results. As long as I am able to purchase BAQ henna, I will not be going back to use synthetic dyes ever again! I am a henna girl for life.

What advice would you give someone who is thinking about trying henna?
Do as much research into henna and the process as you possibly can. Visit the henna forums … they have some very helpful advice. If you know anyone personally who uses BAQ henna in their hair … seek out their experiences. Follow your first instincts … they are usually on point!

Anything else that you’d like to add?
Make haste … make waste. The henna process requires plenty of patience in seeing the results … it gets better as it ages (oxidises) on your hair.

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Want to learn more about Claudine’s experience as a natural in Bermuda? Then stay tuned for Part II of her HairStory, which is the first “official” post as part of our newest guest feature, Naturals Around the World!

Dec2

African vs. African-American Hair Practices

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African vs. African-American Hair Practices

That’s me with the bandana in our senior year of high school.

by Chy’s Curlz

I’ve been thinking of developing this story for a while now. It is the story of how girls were/are made to wear their hair shaved from grade to high school, both in Ghana and in Nigeria.

A little back story, I was born Nigerian and grew up in Nigeria until I was 10 years old when we moved to start a new life in Ghana. Since I spent most of my formative years in Ghana, that became more home to me than Nigeria was. There are many similarities between the two countries and one is the rule to have young girls wear a TWA until they graduate from high school. I think the reasoning behind it is the same as there is for wearing uniforms. It ensures homogeneity, also, the girls who could not afford to get their hair braided did not have the pressure to spend the money and thirdly, everyone looked “neat” and “presentable.” Now, that is not to say it was right or wrong, just giving the possible reasons.

As far as I can tell, this practice was mostly the case in public schools. I noticed that many (not all) private schools permitted their female students to wear their hair at whatever length they wanted, as long as it was braided up neatly. The only girls who were exempt from this rule (public and private school) were those who were biracial. There weren’t many girls who were biracial, but those who were, got to wear their hair long. Again, as a little girl, you don’t think anything of it. You just knew that their hair was “prettier” and more “manageable” than yours and it wasn’t a big deal. You didn’t read meaning into it (at least not consciously), you just accepted it.

I remember our final year of high school, many girls (me included) will grow their hair out, but will tie it down with a scarf overnight to encourage the maximum shrinkage to avoid being punished (spanked) by a teacher. We did this because we knew that once school was out, we were going to get our first relaxers … good times :) .

This practice did not seem like such a big deal to me when I was growing up, but as I get older and upon going natural, I’ve been thinking about how it affected my love, or lack thereof, of my natural hair. You see, most of my friends are Nigerian or Ghanaian and most of them – if not all – sport relaxers and will not let go for anything (although I’ve convinced 7, including my mama, to BC. Yea! #teamnatural). But why is this the case though? Why is it that, after growing up without relaxers, we hold onto it so strongly? Many of the experiences I read on blogs pertaining to natural hair are those of African-American women. They relate how they got their first perm at 4, 5, 6 or thereabouts. The stories go on to say that since relaxers were the norm for them, they just kept getting them until their decision to either BC or transition.

My question is this, why, after having two very different and distinct experiences, do African-American and African woman have this reluctance to let go of the relaxer?

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I love this post! Thanks for sharing your experiences Chy’s and providing many of us with insight into this custom. Hmmm … you know, when it comes down to it, I sometimes think it is still as simple as many of us want what we don’t have. Those with curly hair want straight hair, those with straight hair want curly hair, those with thick hair wish it was thinner, those with super curly hair wish it was looser, those with loose curls wish it was tighter, those with thin hair wish it was thicker, those who are short want to be taller, those who are tall want to be shorter, those who are thin want to be curvier, those who are curvy want to be slimmer … and the list goes on and on and on. Also, I think there is something to be said for personal aesthetic and some just prefer straight, flat, “swingy” hair whereas others prefer curly, full, gravity defying hair! Finally, I also think that we share a common challenge and that is not knowing what our natural hair can really do and not knowing how to care for it in its natural state outside of braids, ponytails and TWAs. When it comes down to it, it seems to me that it might be the “manageability” factor that feeds the reluctance to go natural. For African-American women, it often comes from having relaxers from a young age and not knowing how to care for their hair in any other state. For Nigerian and Ghanaian women, keeping the hair short effectively does the same thing as it’s pretty much wash and go. One is never able to learn how to care for natural hair allowed to grow long, which requires a certain level of knowledge and skill. So, ultimately, for both groups of women, relaxed hair may just seem easier. Just my two … ummm, twenty-five? … cents! Chime in guys! What are your thoughts on this intriguing question??